I have always had a problem saying no. Not to my kids, of course, to them I say “no” all the time. I’m only half-joking when I say there is a good chance my daughter might have thought her name was no for the second 6 months of her life (that’s when they start going mobile, right? Who can remember?).

No, I have a problem saying no to everything and everyone else – and it’s getting harder to say no, in part, because the offers continue to become so much more exciting. First there are the events that I want to attend (Blissdom, Disney, BlogHer, SXSW, Moms Night Out). Then there are the committees, boards and projects that call to me to participate.

For example, I was recently approached by a former client and friend, about the Athena PowerLink program through the South Shore Chamber of Commerce. According to the web site:

ATHENA PowerLink™ is a national business mentoring program offered in partnership with the ATHENA Foundation. Designed for women who want to grow their businesses, the program links women business owners with a team of “hand-picked” business advisors who help the business owner identify critical business objectives and develop strategies to accomplish these objectives. Women business owners who wish to participate in the program must satisfy qualification criteria and submit an application to the WBC/ATHENA PowerLink™ Governing Body, which annually accepts and reviews applications, screens applicants, and selects program recipients.

My friend was approaching me to be the marketing advisor for a business that was a perfect fit (it’s anonymous, but I’m assuming it’s a company that provides a product or service to moms), and would I consider committing to helping the company for the next year.

And, without knowing what the company was, I knew I wanted to help. But, I asked her for a day to think it over.

At the end of our call I was immediately thrown into the chaos that is my life, and at the end of the day I thought “I would be crazy to say yes.” Crazy because I already have two jobs, crazy because on that particular day I had 30 minutes for lunch and then 1 hour to read a book; crazy because today I worked through lunch and found myself taking the half eaten muffin out of my otherwise empty trash can and eating it for lunch; crazy because, well, crazy because I cannot do it all.

I’m learning, in my old age, that I have to know when to say no. No, I cannot go to Blissdom (wah!). No, I cannot go to Disney (aurgh!). No, I cannot join the advisory board (boo hoo!!).

That’s not to say I’m never going to say yes again. In fact, I just said yes to joining the National Wildlife Federation’s Founding Moms Advisory Council (more info on that to come), but that’s in part because it’s something I can do with my kids and my husband.

And while I’m sad I can’t help, I’m also proud that I’m learning that it’s okay to say no.