The Mominatrix, Kristen Chase
Tonight I have the opportunity to interview Kristen Chase, the author of The Mominatrix’s Guide to Sex – A sex advice book for naughty moms.
But I need your help! Given the chance to talk frankly with the Mominatrix, what questions would you ask?
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11 Responses to Ask the Mominatrix
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Partially as a result of my looming PhD dissertation deadline, my DH and I have tried and failed many times at getting back into the swing of things after the birth of our 7-month old. At first it was uncomfortable for me, then it was my lack of interest, now it’s boredom, stress, and exhaustion. My extra 30lbs and sore breasts aren’t helping matters any, either. I am looking for more than the usual ‘lube up and go’ routine, but I am finding it hard to be more specific than that. Please tell me I should not be feeling guilty about this. Is is OK for me to want my DH to step up and help me out of this rut? How can I explain this to him in a way that he will understand, and (more importantly) respond to?
I’m currently the mother of a 4 and a half year old and I’m thinking about trying to conceive in the near future. My husband is into it and I’m sort of into it only because I’m afraid that our sex life is going to go completely down the tubes. I love sex. I need sex. It de-stresses me but I’m afraid if we have a #2, there won’t be enough TIME for satisfying sex. Is there any advice or encouragement that can squash my “fear”?
Prior to having kids, we never needed any toys or outside stimulation. Now, between work and the kids, we are both always exhausted. When we have the energy to get into it, it’s pretty great. More often than not it isn’t good. Would toys help? What should we look into?
How can I get my brain to SLOW DOWN? When my husband wants to get things going, I’m busy thinking about the laundry, the lunches I didn’t pack, and all of the loose ends I forgot. That alone is a deal-breaker! But once we get into it, I can mostly forget that stuff. But how do I get over the initial resistance?
Sometimes the side effects of certain medications is that the libido decreases. How does one get beyond that and find the desire to be intimate again?
How about sex for single moms. I’ve been widowed for not quite two years. Not really ready to jump back in yet, but have no idea about how to handle that sort of thing when I am. Especially nervous about starting out again after not doing it for so long.
How do I convince DH that midnight – 4:00 AM is NOT the most ideal time.
I call him “Captain Midnight” because that is the ONLY TIME intimacy ever happens for us – when he wakes me up from a dead sleep.
I don’t want to always say no to Cap’n M (I often do say no) because then our sexlife would cease to exist.
Any time I try to intitiate at more approriate (and less exhausting) times, he seems more interested in the sports highlights, his book, an app on his iPhone, blah-de-blah!
ooh… this is gonna be a good show. I wish you had a video podcast, so we could see you blushing as you ask these questions!!
And here’s another…
My husband and I do not have matching libidos… He would love it twice a day, and once or twice a week is enough for me. As someone said in a discussion on the Big Tent, once I get into it, I really do enjoy it, but it is hard to clear my mind, clear my schedule and “just do it”!
How do we even things out to make both of us happy?
How do you get in the mood? I have zero libido and it just isn’t fun or good anymore. It definitely does not feel the same since having a baby.
I have a similar situation that Lori does. I go to bed somewhere between 10-11:30pm. The hubby anywhere between 2-3:30am. That last thing I want to do when I am overworked, exhausted and overstressed is be woken up in the smackdab middle of the night to only have to get up in a couple of hours. Suggestions?
I’m with Yolanda….medication can suck the libido. Any thoughts?